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Relationships With Depth

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inquiry & integration

inquiry instructions

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Inquiry:  What are the 3 things you’d like to talk about with your closest friend that might be most fulfilling?

Personal Integration: This practice can be done alone or with a friend, lover, or counselor. Take one to five minutes or longer to contemplate and answer the question. When done with another, it is essential that the listener remains neutral and encourages you by repeating this inquiry as needed to help maintain focus.  We all have a tendency to get into patterns where we  talk only about certain things.  Sometimes t because this is all we are comfortable discussing, and sometimes it is because we are afraid or we are just following what we think is the prevalent social convention.  This questioning challenges you to break out of someone else’s model of communication, and create your own.  Let yourself really imagine how fulfillment with your friend(s) would feel.  Envision what you’d like to talk about, and also how you could be supported.  Let yourself become aware of the questions you’d like to ask a friend, and what kinds of things you’d be open to talk about in your personal life.  Don’t be satisfied with your past patterns.  Go into the unknown as you ask yourself this question.
Inquiry 2:  If you were going to change the quality of your friendships in any way, what would that be? 
Personal Integration 2: Follow the same instructions as above in the monologue or repeating question format.  There are a lot of possible qualities in friendship.  (refer to Introspective Guides on Needs and Qualities)  They could include, compassionate, trustworthy, intimate, open, communicative, fun, tender, maturity, integrity, honest, inspiring, or adventurous.  Let your inspirational imagination  conjure up the qualities that you most want to seek within your friendships.   Once you have identified the qualities, spend some time scanning the people you know and imagine how those relationships might be more fulfilling.  Have the courage to seek what you really want and need.
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Since 1972, Humanistic Spirituality founder Robert Strock has maintained a private spiritual and therapeutic counseling practice that specializes in purposeful living, relationships, spiritual psychology, and death and dying counseling. Humanistic Spirituality provides various spiritual workshops, guided mediations, and licensed marriage family therapists and licensed social work continuing education courses. Contact us to learn how we can help you find inner peace and spiritual awareness through our counseling, or our free guided meditations, videos, audios, writings, introspective guises and more. A warm welcome from the team at Humanistic Spirituality.

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