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How We Ask For What We Want

inquiry & integration

inquiry instructions

Inquiry: Notice the quality of how you ask for what you want when it’s not coming from your heart. Ask how does my tone sound? How would the tone sound if I were to ask in a way that is relaxed and closer to my heart?

Personal Integration: This practice can be done alone or with a friend, lover, or counselor. Take one to five minutes or longer to contemplate and answer the question. When done with another, it is essential that the listener remains neutral and encourages you by repeating this inquiry as needed to help maintain focus. Let yourself be supported in this question by visualizing a handful of the most important people in your life where you are asking for something that you want for yourself. Remember actual situations that have happened, or imagine ones that realistically could happen in the future. Take special note if it is difficult for you recall scenarios where you ask for help, as it is possible that you are someone who is reluctant to do so. Seeing this may motivate you to discover your needs for inner support more directly. (refer to The Introspective Guides List of Challenging Feelings and Needs)

Inquiry 2: How would your tone of voice sound if the way you asked was really anchored in your heart? What qualities would most naturally emerge from you?

Personal Integration 2: Take some time to envision those that are important in your life. It could be a boss, a lover, sibling, or friend, parent, or anyone who may come up when you think of asking for what you want. Listen for the most natural heart qualities you can evoke when you ask for what you’d like. Really focus on your own best nature emerging as you ask. Let it be like an informal prayer, and take the time needed to find these essential parts of yourself.

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	How We Ask For What We Want <p> Inquiry: Notice the quality of how you ask for what you want when it’s not coming from your heart. Ask how does my tone sound? How would the tone sound if I were to ask in a way that is relaxed and closer to my heart?</p><p> Personal Integration: This practice can be done alone or with a friend, lover, or counselor. Take one to five minutes or longer to contemplate and answer the question. When done with another, it is essential that the listener remains neutral and encourages you by repeating this inquiry as needed to help maintain focus. Let yourself be supported in this question by visualizing a handful of the most important people in your life where you are asking for something that you want for yourself. Remember actual situations that have happened, or imagine ones that realistically could happen in the future. Take special note if it is difficult for you recall scenarios where you ask for help, as it is possible that you are someone who is reluctant to do so. Seeing this may motivate you to discover your needs for inner support more directly. (refer to The <a href="http://www.humanisticspirituality.org/?page=introspective_guides">Introspective Guides</a> List of Challenging Feelings and Needs)</p><p> Inquiry 2: How would your tone of voice sound if the way you asked was really anchored in your heart? What qualities would most naturally emerge from you?</p><p> Personal Integration 2: Take some time to envision those that are important in your life. It could be a boss, a lover, sibling, or friend, parent, or anyone who may come up when you think of asking for what you want. Listen for the most natural heart qualities you can evoke when you ask for what you’d like. Really focus on your own best nature emerging as you ask. Let it be like an informal prayer, and take the time needed to find these essential parts of yourself.</p> http://humanisticspirituality.org/?page=view&id=5&kind=Videos&topic=tone+of+voice

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How We Ask For What We Want

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Learning that how we ask for what we want is even more important than what we ask for. This tone of voice will greatly influence the outcome of how well we are treated.

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receiving giving exploring the question inquiry tone of voice how to get what you want friendliness aggression anxious key relationships personal patterns presence awareness intellectual irritable

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