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Contained Anger Contemplation

It is critical that we learn to contain anger because we can become dangerous when it is present. Most of us are convinced that the source of our anger is largely on the outside. In my view, this is, at best, half true. We are also angry because we are afraid, self-rejecting, we lack an adequate sense of self, and we are dependent.

Mostly, anger is a re-action, (acting again) and reactively dumping our anger is inevitably going to fuel the fire, even if the fire was seemingly started by someone else. This requires a radical shift in how we view the causes of our anger and best ways to handle it. This second practice, a more controlled one, is “Containing anger.” This can help people who best benefit when the intensity of the anger is limited, and there is a continuous effort to be focused, direct, and clear regarding the source of the anger. With containment and the focus staying on your thwarted need(s), there’s a better chance the listener will be able to hear, rather than getting caught up in his or her defenses. Remember, you are likely to create emotional stress and damage when you’re just dumping anger, even if you think it’s a small anger.

Before you begin the following contemplation practice, visualize and remember as best you can, the last time you felt aggression due to an intense interaction with someone close to you. Choose an example in which the impact is still affecting you. Imagine you are with this person and in your aggression now. Pause. See if you can feel your feelings. It cannot be said too often, that there is a huge difference between intellectual understanding and integrating a practice. The central intention here is to help you create effective practices for your daily life.

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Since 1972, Humanistic Spirituality founder Robert Strock has maintained a private spiritual and therapeutic counseling practice that specializes in purposeful living, relationships, spiritual psychology, and death and dying counseling. Humanistic Spirituality provides various spiritual workshops, guided mediations, and licensed marriage family therapists and licensed social work continuing education courses. Contact us to learn how we can help you find inner peace and spiritual awareness through our counseling, or our free guided meditations, videos, audios, writings, introspective guises and more. A warm welcome from the team at Humanistic Spirituality.

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