Inquiry 1: What is my most challenging emotional state as it relates to my partner? What is my need underneath? What is the quality that I need to focus on in my own heart and soul? (see the Introspective Guides Challenging feelings and Needs)
Personal Integration 1: This practice can be done alone or with a friend, lover, or counselor. Take one to five minutes or longer to contemplate and answer the question. When done with another, it is essential that the listener remains neutral and encourages you to repeat this inquiry as needed to help maintain focus.When you have done this with your partner invite them to do the same with you.
Inquiry 2: What is the underlying need that is greatest as it relates to my partner? (see the Introspective Guides: Challenging Feelings and Needs)
Personal Integration 2:
Follow the instructions above, asking your partner or friend to listen in the same neutral way as they did in the first inquiry. Look at the Introspective Guide and let them know what your primary need is. When you have done this with your partner invite them to do the same with you.
Inquiry 3: After you’ve expressed from your heart what it is that you need and your partner has given you a unreceptive response, what quality or action do you need to stay focused on to stay connected to your heart?
Personal Integration 3: Take as much time as you need to answer this very difficult question. Don’t be surprised if this takes numerous times to come to clarity as it is always most difficult when we don’t get what we want in an area where we are attached to our perceptions. (refer to Introspective Guides Complete set of Needs and Qualities) Encourage yourself to focus on your greatest need or quality, whether it is autonomy, acceptance, trust, peace, or even sincerely not knowing. This is an exercise that you may need to do on your own if your partner either disagrees with your perceptions or can’t take care of your needs.
Imagine you are looking for a pure tone and quality of heart and some relaxation. Gently ask, “How can I nurture myself?” Take a few minutes to make sure this kind tone is resonating inside of you. Listen for a frequency or a melody that touches your heart.
Since 1972, Humanistic Spirituality founder Robert Strock has maintained a private spiritual and therapeutic counseling practice that specializes in purposeful living, relationships, spiritual psychology, and death and dying counseling. Humanistic Spirituality provides various spiritual workshops, guided mediations, and licensed marriage family therapists and licensed social work continuing education courses. Contact us to learn how we can help you find inner peace and spiritual awareness through our counseling, or our free guided meditations, videos, audios, writings, introspective guises and more. A warm welcome from the team at Humanistic Spirituality.